Hey guys to start this off my name is Tyson Rosenbaum-Callaby.

Thank you for taking the time to read this and hear my story, so let’s begin.

I was a normal teenager, rebellious… I knew everything, the normal teenager stage of life. At this particular time of my life I was 15 years old, I was angry and upset with life and how things were going so I went to the house of a man I knew, he was in his late 50s early 60s - he was supplying me alcohol and smokes. (In my head he was an awesome bloke at that point, what rebellious 15-year-old would say no to that, certainly not me.)

As I got more and more tipsy, he ushered me into his room & this is where I started to feel a little bit off in the stomach but didn’t think anything of it at first.

It was at this point, my life changed for a very long time. He dropped his dressing gown, completely naked underneath, and told me that if I were to say anything to anyone, he would hurt my family & make me a witness to it. I swallowed my saliva in fear of what was happening and what was going to happen. He pushed my face into his groin area and told me how he was going to punish me because I had been a “bad boy”. At this point I was frozen in shock; I knew exactly what was going to happen to me. I won’t go into the details of what happened, but I was raped & assaulted by this “man”. My 15-year-old self was silently crying, I had no idea what to do. I always said if this were to happen to me, I would kick, bite, fight back – I’d do anything to get away, but when faced with this, I was frozen, I could not move. The assault lasted for about 4 hours. I could do nothing but lay there & take what was happening to me. He again threatened to hurt me and my family if I was to ever say anything. As soon as it was over, I ran. I ran for that front door; I ran for my life.

One of my mates lived a couple doors down from this man’s house. My mate used to let his 10-year-old son go to this man’s house alone. I ran inside and warned him to NEVER let his son go there again!

I got home & I sat in my room in the corner off my bed crying and cutting myself because I had just told someone what had happened and I thought that my family was next, that I had put them in danger. I couldn’t stop self-harming, I felt disgusted in myself because of what I had just gone through. I started having thoughts of suicide because I felt I would be better off that way and I won’t have this happen to me ever again if I’m gone; I acted on those thoughts, I attempted to take my life. The next day I woke up and continued my day as normally as I could.

I was confronted by my mate’s mum that afternoon about the things I said the night before. I was told I was a liar because I hadn’t called the cops or told anyone else. I got angry & my brother snatched my phone off me & was told the story of what happened. He lit up with anger almost instantly. I panicked and begged him not to say or do anything. We walked home, my brother's mate went to my house and told my parents what had happened. My brother went to this “mans” house to confront him and I called the police as I feared what was going to happen. I told them everything. They took the man into the police station, I gave my statement and got checked out by the hospital.

One year later, I went to court and I was told they didn’t have enough evidence to convict him for what he did. All he got was a lifetime AVO & if he ever approaches me, he will go to jail. Still, nobody believed me. To make things worse, I was trying to figure myself out; I wasn’t sure if I was gay, bisexual or straight; I was confused.

I was tormented by one kid for what happened to me; saying “I should have enjoyed it because I was “gay”’. For years and years, I would cut myself, and continue to take my life; constantly blaming myself. To this day I know it’s not my fault, but I still feel that if I hadn't gone to his house, it wouldn’t have happened.

It has taken me a very long time to put this behind me and bury it deep. 9 years later and I still feel pain from this, it will never go away and never get easier. I’m now 24 years old, I have 5 beautiful children and an amazing partner who, if she didn’t walk in my life 2 years ago, who knows where I would be right now.

Thank you for taking the time to read this. I can only hope that I have shown people that they are not alone, that it is a very real thing and it is out there; and that it's ok not to be ok.